Inspiration & Faith Writing Challenge

But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous lig

 

A friend posted about a 31 day writing challenge. I decided to take it.

Why? When I already have so much going on?  lol  Well, I used to write A LOT. It’s how my hubby and I met. Writing poetry. Writing stories. It was an outlet for me.

It’s been years since I really did that. I do some social media posts and my Bold in the Soul posts…but I have been feeling the tug to write more. Even in journaling.

So I decided to sign up. Even if I don’t do the full 31 days…I am hoping that it will inspire me to write more. Writing has always helped my mind and heart. And we all need that, don’t we? 🙂

 

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I Am Worthy

Worthy

God has been working in me a lot lately. After a lifetime of never feeling good enough…it’s hard to overcome. But God is AWESOME and has shown me that I am MORE than enough!  I just have to keep walking in it!

Saturday, our church went to Hungry Mother State Park in Virginia. There are tons of activities to do there, but my husband and I chose to walk the lake trail. We weren’t going to do the whole trail but because I wanted to, my husband said we would. Y’all…I am SO proud of him! He is 69 and did the whole 6.35 miles with me!!

I had just came from a conversation with two friends from church.  My one friend was talking about the dream that she had the night before. It was definitely a dream from God and had great meaning. It was after that, that Paul and I went walking.

Though my husband and I are together all the time, we don’t spend enough QUALITY time together. Just each other and talking. This walk was awesome. It was just me and him talking to each other and worshiping and praising God. Such a GORGEOUS day that God gave us for this. Soft breezes, it wasn’t too hot or too cold. It was just perfect. And for most of it, we didn’t even have other people around. It’s like God wanted us to have this time together.

I remember at one point telling Paul, my husband, that I get frustrated sometimes because I don’t have dreams and visions like other people do. That I feel God is trying to give me all that but I feel like there is a wall there.  Paul’s words were, “It’s not a PHYSICAL wall. It’s mental. You have to push through it.” He then told me that he feels like I think I’m not good enough for it. That is EXACTLY how I’ve always felt.

Fast forward to Sunday, the next day.  I was in a conversation with 2 of my friends at church…one of them being the same one from Saturday that had the dream.  I was talking about the walk and the talk my husband and I had. How I told him that I wanted dreams and visions as well.  My friend told me she was glad I said that because God has put me in her heart. And she felt like I didn’t feel worthy. But that God wants me to have that along with baptism of Holy Spirit.

WOW! Pretty much what I had said. I didn’t feel good enough. Didn’t feel worthy.

Both of my friends decided to pray over me right then. For walls to be torn down. For me to know who I am and WHOSE I am. That I AM WORTHY. I AM GOOD ENOUGH! That the enemies lies would be rejected! It was BEFORE worship had even started.

Whew! I felt God start a work in me and I know it’s more and more each day.  And oh how God worked through worship and regular service.  All of our worship songs were about tearing down lies and walls that day. I felt Him moving in me, all over! What an awesome ENCOUNTER!!

During the prayer and service, I saw this journaling in my mind. So I had to do it when I got home.

To some, I am sure it sounds crazy. But to me…it was and is confirmation. Of all that God has in store for me. Of all that God is doing in me!

Thank you, Heavenly Daddy!

This is one of the songs…and one we have been singing a few weeks at church. One of my new favorites!

God Wants My Voice Back

VoiceBack

 

A couple of days ago, my friend had commented on a Facebook post.  We then commented back and forth a couple times and I posted this. “I think that’s why I’m quiet. God wants my voice back & satan fights to keep it. he knows what God is going to do with it”

It hit me that statement was more than a statement. It was God speaking to me. This was also right after a church service we had about our life dreams.  God definitely got me to thinking during that service.  But I really FELT it in my spirit when I wrote that. “God wants my voice back.” From that moment, it never left my thoughts. I even took a nap after church and went to sleep thinking about it.

We had a service at church that night, Worship through the Arts.  We were able to show how we worship God through the arts.  I had decided not to really do anything, as I am blessed to do a few different artistic things. I decided to just worship as others were sharing.  I did take my journal and Bible, though, in case I wanted to write or doodle.

Again, God just keep bringing that back to me. “God wants my voice back.” So I knew that needed to just write it out.  I felt in my spirit that to journal, that time, was to just write words and doodles. I did end up sharing what God spoke to me about my voice but also my “Chosen” declarations that He gave me during the Bold in the Soul challenge in June.

Now…a little about me.  I am quiet, shy, and always thought I didn’t matter or that I wasn’t good enough. I grew up poor and in areas that people looked down on. I was from a broken home and I was overweight.  So yes, I was bullied. And I just always felt like I didn’t or couldn’t make a difference. Even though I know otherwise, now, those words and actions by others still affect me. I just kept to myself. I have always despised speaking in front of people because I knew they would be looking at me. It makes me feel vulnerable and scared that I will mess up and they will laugh at me. Or think I’m not good enough.

Lately, though, God has been telling me it’s time to change it. That it’s time to let all that go, for good. That my past is that. My past.  That it’s time for me to use my words for Him.  Yes, I write. But He wants more. He wants SPOKEN words. He has more in store for my future. GOD WANTS MY VOICE BACK!!

I love how God works. In the past few months, He has sent quite a few different people to prophesy and speak into my life about how God is going to use me to speak. He is taking me through different trainings to help me with this. Not just through others…but God has let me know that it’s time to let go of that fear. That He wants to HEAR my words. Not just see them.

He wants me to MOVE.  He wants me to SPEAK! And I know it’s not about me. It’s ALL about HIM!

So…for too long, I have hidden myself. I have let satan take my voice. Making me think it was worthless and useless. BUT GOD!! God says otherwise! It’s why the enemy has fought so hard. The enemy knows that God is going to use my voice to RISE UP and to RAISE UP others for HIM! God is going to use my voice to make an impact for the KINGDOM OF GOD!!

So, satan, GOD WANTS MY VOICE BACK…and He is going to get it!  It might take a bit for me to fully let go of the un-confidence (yeah, not proper English  lol)…but God is going to use that too! To show others that with HIM … ALL things are possible!

Heavenly Daddy… HERE I AM…Send Me!

 

 

Freedom

**** This is from the Bold in the Soul challenge in June. I needed this reminder. And I think it might help someone else, as well, right now.
Food is my struggle. I KNOW that I am healed of that addiction.  I just have to continually walk in that freedom.  It’s not easy, at all. It’s a day by day thing.  And I am learning how to keep giving it all to God! ***
Day4BW-6

FREEDOM: the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved.

This is NOT the photo I had in mind to do when I knew this was my word. I do NOT like doing these photos.  But when God leads me in that direction, I go with it. Especially when He’s telling me it’s for my FREEDOM!

God kept impressing this word on my heart and in my spirit today. My friend even gave me a bracelet with the word FREE…and that was after I had decided the word.


Today, at church, God broke more chains from me. I received FREEDOM from Food Addiction! I received FREEDOM from shame! FREEDOM from myself!
My friend, Amanda, has been special to me ever since I met her. God has always used her to reach me in ways I can’t explain. This morning she posted this on her FB:

“Adam and Eve hid from shame, clothing themselves in fig leaves. They hid from their Father when He came to commune with them. Yet, the Father took the skin of an animal, foreshadowing the shedding of the precious blood of Jesus, and covered them in skins. Jesus redeemed all that was lost in the garden and more. Now we are clothed in Him, skin to skin.”

Then, at church, she spoke on this and how she had let shame cover her, as well. God spoke to me tremendously through this. God revealed things to me, even deeper than before.

I know that food addiction is MORE than the food. It’s really NOT about the food. It’s about what’s in my heart. And today, He laid it out for me. To me. In me. I knew it before. But today, He made me SEE it and FEEL it and KNOW it!

Just yesterday and this morning before church, I was messaging with friends about this very thing. How I have been struggling lately, more than usual, with it. God brought all this to mind as Amanda was speaking at church today. God definitely used her to reach me, once again, today.

Why have I been addicted to food? I use it as a cover. To cover pain from my past. To hide because I’ve been told so many times that I’m not good enough. Why? Because I was always been overweight and didn’t have a big house or name brand clothes as a child. I used it as a cover because I was ashamed of who I was and what I looked like.

I have always been one that when I lose weight, I stop after a while and then start gaining. Why? Because it’s easy to hide behind the weight. As the weight comes off, so does layers of heartache and pain. So does layers of shame that I have heaped upon myself. As the weight comes off, people start seeing me more. Looking at me more. Wanting to know more.

When this happens, it’s scary. Because it’s then that God is able to dig deeper into my soul and uncover things that I would rather leave covered. I let God in but only so far. Today He showed me that I do that. Healing isn’t always easy and simple. Most of the time, real healing HURTS. Real FREEDOM hurts! It’s time that I let Him in all the way. It’s time that I get raw and totally open to Him.

My friend, Kasey, told me, “Living in freedom can sometimes be harder than obeying strict rules”

Wow, what a word! It’s so true. Obeying rules is easy, there really is not a lot of thinking involved once you get the rules down. You can just do what needs to be done and go on.

That is NOT how God wants us to live. He wants us to live in TRUE FREEDOM!! He wants to reach into us and bring out all the junk we want to hide. He wants to bring it out so we can let go of it! So we can move forward! He wants to rip off the layers of shame and cover us with FREEDOM!

Today, God truly showed me that I am NOT food addiction. I am NOT shame. I am NOT timid. I am NOT unworthy.

Today, God showed me that I am FREE! I am a SHAME SLAYER! I am BRAVE! I am FEARLESS! I am WORTHY! I am ENOUGH! I am HIS!

As Amanda said, “Jesus redeemed all that was lost in the garden and more. Now we are clothed in Him, skin to skin.”

God heard that prayer said for me. And has already started answering! lol

This verse that Sarah gave me really hit, as well…

Galatians 5:1
For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.

I’m no longer a slave!  ⚔️  ⚔️  ⚔️ 
FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM!

#GodsGirl #BeautifullyBroken #Freedom#BoldInTheSoul #RevelationWellness#NoLongerASlave #FreedomInChrist #Beautiful#Worthy #GoodEnough #Fearless #ShameSlayer#FitnessTeacherGospelPreacher #MightyVoice#Brave #RevWellVoice #RevWellApparel

 — feeling Free.

** I am currently doing a writing challenge with some other great ladies. Below are the links to their blog posts, as well. Please take a moment and visit them!

http://www.iamsarahmichal.com/2017/09/05/not-open-not-closed/

https://livspiruetter.wordpress.com/2017/09/12/writing-challenge-1-god-redeems-so-dont-give-up-on-relationships/

https://beautifullybroken61.wordpress.com/2017/09/11/freedom/

http://www.spuronlove.com/things-i-need-my-kids-to-know-before-i-die-call-people-up/

Day 1: Bold in the Soul Challenge

Day 1: #BoldInTheSoul Challenge

This is one of my favorite challenges with Revelation Wellness – Healthy & Whole. Probably because I am a word person and I am a photographer. We get to use our warpaint (sharpie) for words to show and tell about our boldness in Christ and what God is telling us about ourselves. A physical trait or a soul trait. Just what makes us Bold In The Soul~

For me, for a while now…God has been using the word Brave. He has definitely shown me that I do NOT fear things like I used to. He has brought me WAY out of my comfort zone. Especially through my instructor training! He used that week to REALLY break me free from chains that held me bound in fear.

I still have a ways to go with different areas…but even today, I am stepping out of myself and letting HIM use me for HIS glory! I am taking what He has given me and trying to help others. Today, I am starting a walking group with my church family. And soon, I will also be reaching out to others outside of my church! I am so excited, but yes, a little nervous. Even though it’s my family and friends.

Are all my fears gone? No. I’m real and honest. I am still working on them. But I do NOT let them overtake me anymore!! I move forward in boldness rather than slinking back in shame!

So today…my word is BRAVE. God wants me to be strong and courageous; brave! So that is what I am always trying to do!

The song, below, has also been in my spirit for a while. God has great plans for me. And especially this verse and chorus are exactly what God has been doing in me!

Brave: ready to face and endure danger or pain; showing courage.

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

“You Make Me Brave” by Amanda Cook

I have heard You calling my name
I have heard the song of love that You sing
So I will let you draw me out beyond the shore
Into Your grace

You make me brave, You make me brave
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves
You make me brave, You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the Love that made a way

#GodsGirl #BeautifullyBroken #BRAVE#BoldInTheSoul #RevelationWellness#RevWellVoice #Joshua19 #YouMakeMeBrave#NoFear #RevWellApparel