He Goes Before Me

Defender

Today, Paul and I went walking. Lately, I have been battling depression and it hasn’t been pretty. No real reason, other than Winter and a couple physical issues going on. But I haven’t wanted (or felt like) doing much of anything. Add in the weather and it’s craziness, well…I’ve just been exhausted, mentally and physically. It’s the worst it’s been in quite a while.

But, today, God gave me more visual reminders that He is always with me. He goes before me and He surrounds me with His love and strength.

We walked a bit together and then we split up for a bit for Paul to go by the river and me to walk a little further…then we met back up to finish the walk together.

As I was walking by myself, I started talking to God. As I was talking and praying, I just started looking ahead of me and around me.  Each place that I looked, there was a yellow spot — in front of me — beside me — all around me. At first, I didn’t even think about it, just noticed them. And thought it was different. It looked like “spirit spots” you see in photos.

As I continued to see them (this all happened in about only a couple of minutes) – I finally realized God was talking back to me and showing me some things. I had been talking to Him about how I had been feeling and asking Him to help me. It hit me that those spots was God showing and telling me that He always goes before me. Good and bad. He’s always beside me and around me. He has me surrounded by ALL OF HIM. I am not alone. He is always with me.

I had decided not to listen to music, but just talk, listen, and hear. Right when I finally got what God was saying to and showing me with those yellow spots…Holy Spirit put the song “Defender” in my heart.   It just started playing over and over in my head.

On the way home, after we finished our walk, I listened to that song. There was a part that I had forgotten about. It’s the lyrics on the photo above. But oh how God used it to remind me that no matter how I am feeling…He is there. In all those broken pieces.

“When I thought I lost me
You knew where I left me
You reintroduced me to Your love
You picked up all my pieces
Put me back together
You are the defender of my heart”

Lately, I’ve felt lost and broken. That’s what depression does. And many times, for no big reason. God used many things today to remind me WHO I am and WHOSE I am!

My Heavenly Daddy is awesome. He is holding me – surrounding me with His love. Singing lullabies to my heart. Letting me know that it’s ok to NOT be ok — and that He is right there holding me up when I am unable to do it for myself. And that when I cry…even those unseen tears… He kisses them away.

And it’s OK to rest in Him. It’s not lazy. That sometimes my body and my mind need rest…even if I don’t understand it.

Yes, the enemy brings battles…BUT GOD!! He has already won them all! He will always put my pieces back together. He is my Defender, especially when I’m lost and unable to defend my own heart and mind.

Yes…He is the defender of my heart!

Here is the song…Defender…and a couple of other ones that He put out for me to hear today.

 

 

Advertisements

Words Matter



What we tell ourselves:

I’m not good enough.
I can’t do that.
I’m afraid.

What we hear others say: (even if it’s not really what they say)

You never do.
You always say.
You’re too much.
You shouldn’t.

What say to each other:

We never.
We can’t.
We won’t.

But…God says differently.

God CAN.

Matthew 19:26

God WILL.

Jeremiah 29:11

God DOES.

John 3:16


We have to love ourselves first before we can love others. (Mark 12:31).
We MUST start speaking life and not death over ourselves and others. LIFE. LOVE. HOPE. FAITH. 

Speak POSITIVE…not negative. Take those thoughts captive. Turn them around for GOOD. 

Words matter. Let your words speak life. Let your words speak love. Let your words make a difference.

2 Corinthians 12:9

 

 

Puzzle Piece

Puzzle

Coming back from my friend Jessica’s Bible book study, I was doing a lot of thinking. Lately, I had been recognizing God speaking to me in different ways. That night, one the way home, God gave me the image of a puzzle piece. I didn’t understand exactly what it meant, at the time, but in my spirit I knew it was from Him.

As I continued driving, I started thinking about that piece of puzzle. I mean, I hadn’t been thinking of a puzzle and hadn’t talked about one at the study. So I knew there had to be good meaning. As I was thinking, Holy Spirit dropped some things in my spirit. And continued to speak to me about it throughout the next week or so.

— God isn’t just a piece of us. But each one of us is a piece of HIM. We all fit together like a puzzle.

— We think life is a puzzle, we think that God can be a puzzle. But it’s not that, it’s just that each one of us…each person that He made…is just a piece of Him and all that is Him. We aren’t meant to know it all.  That’s why it seems to be puzzling to us. We aren’t meant to understand each piece, but just fit them (our pieces) together and then He will show us the finished product, when it’s time.

— He gave me this image of a picture of Jesus/Him and how it’s like a collage. A big put together puzzle, with each one of us being a single puzzle piece. Just one piece of the puzzle. But together, we make a whole. Make life WHOLE. If our piece is missing, that’s when things start looking wrong and we start to feel “puzzled” at life, not understanding. Because we can’t see the whole picture He has for us. It’s when life starts to shift more toward worldly things and ideas. He makes each of us and our piece unique. We all have things to offer. He gives each one of us gifts. But we tend to look at other peoples puzzle piece, instead of our own. That’s why we need to ALL come together as THE church. Not people fussing and arguing about “religious” things.

— Many times we let the world make us feel like we don’t fit in. But in reality, the reason we don’t feel like we fit in, is because we are in the wrong place. We take our piece of the puzzle (who we are), and try to fit into the puzzle in places we aren’t meant to fit.  Just because we want to fit into certain places or groups…that doesn’t mean that is what God has in store for us. He made us to fit perfectly into the puzzle of life…in just the right place and with the right people. The ones that will grow us and help us…not slow us and hinder us. He made us, our piece of puzzle, to fit perfectly in Him! We just have to let Him put us where He wants and needs us!

1 Corinthians 12:12-31

12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. 14 Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.

15 Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? 18 But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. 19 If they were all one part, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many parts, but one body.

21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” 22 On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, 23 and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, 24 while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it,25 so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. 26 If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.

27 Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. 28 And God has placed in the church first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues. 29 Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? 30 Do all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues? Do all interpret? 31 Now eagerly desire the greater gifts.

And yet I will show you the most excellent way.

Show & Tell

Do you remember show and tell at school?

I do! It’s the only time that I really liked being in front of everyone. (Yes, I’m an introvert!) During show and tell, I could share what seemed to be be most important to me. I would show it off and tell all about it and why it was most important to me.

Recently, I was able to go back to Revelation Wellness instructor retreat — but this time as a Reviver. Meaning — I was able to just BE. Only doing what I felt led to do. Just being with God.

During this week at Revive retreat, God showed up in so many ways. But one major one for me was inviting me to know Him more. Seek Him more.

It’s like He wanted to have show and tell time with me.

I’ve had this blog in mind for a week or so but it just didn’t happen. I can’t honestly say it wasn’t the right time…but that I just let it go. I’ve learned that even when our heart wants to do more seeking, praying, reading, listening, etc. — our mind doesn’t always follow. When we take away some distractions — the enemy will just throw you different ones.

But being snowed in today, I thought it was a good time.

So — back to show and tell time with my Heavenly Daddy! 

Do you realize that this happens daily? Constantly? We just overlook it. Take it for granted. Take a moment. Look all around you. Look at His creation. He’s showing and telling us so much!

Papa God has already had the ULTIMATE show and tell with us. His name is Jesus.

Love –> the GREATEST gift –> The GREATEST LOVE is Jesus!

Jesus showed us true love, unconditional love and God has told us all about it in His Word. The Bible.

When did I stop seeing and hearing that love? When did YOU?
When did I stop seeing and knowing who I truly am? When did YOU?

I don’t know the exact day…but I can tell you the why.
DISTRACTIONS. 

 Just like Martha (Luke 10:38-42) was distracted by all the preparations to do — we are also distracted by all the stuff in the world and in our lives. Jesus only wants one thing.  For us to be like Mary. To sit at His feet. For us to know Him. Love Him. Want Him.

He wants more show and tell time. So He can show and tell us about the greatest love. About our Heavenly Daddy. About ourselves.

When we stop and look around…when we look inside of ourselves…when we really look at others…God will show who He really is. We will see beauty in ALL of it. Good instead of bad. Love instead of hate.

He wants to tell us all about it. He wants to show us every bit of it.

How? We just need to seek Him. We need to listen. We need sit with Him. Read His word. It’s His great show and tell to us. It tells us the whole story.

THEN…we can bring show and tell time to others. We can show them Jesus…just by how we live our lives. We can tell them all about Him…through our testimonies. Through the everyday living of life. By letting our light shine…and always pointing it ALL back to Him. Through praising Him and worshiping Him.

Our everyday life is made to be Show & Tell for our Heavenly Daddy! Let Him Transform your mind, heart, soul, and body. Seek Him. Seek His face, the love He is offering. Seek Him in everything. Read His love letter to us, the Bible.

Here are some Bible verses that can help to remind you…just click on the verse.

Psalm 27…all of it is awesome, so linking to the whole thing…but Vs. 8 is that seeking reminder. 

Hebrews 4:12 … His Word is ALIVE.

John 14:6-8 … He has shown us that He is the only way. 

Romans 12:1-2 … Be transformed! 

______________________________________________________________________________

This song is amazing and just fit perfectly with “Show and Tell”. Here is just a bit of the lyrics.  Posted below is the whole song video. Definitely worth the listen!


“Whisper” by Jason Upton

What you whisper in my ear
Let it find room in my heart
Like a garden let your words begin to grow
When my faith is prone to fear

Remind me of your love
Remind me that you’ll never let me go

Whisper whisper whisper in my ear
Tell me words I thought I’d never hear
Show me show me show me what you see
Illuminate what’s right in front of me 

 

 

I Am Worthy

Worthy

God has been working in me a lot lately. After a lifetime of never feeling good enough…it’s hard to overcome. But God is AWESOME and has shown me that I am MORE than enough!  I just have to keep walking in it!

Saturday, our church went to Hungry Mother State Park in Virginia. There are tons of activities to do there, but my husband and I chose to walk the lake trail. We weren’t going to do the whole trail but because I wanted to, my husband said we would. Y’all…I am SO proud of him! He is 69 and did the whole 6.35 miles with me!!

I had just came from a conversation with two friends from church.  My one friend was talking about the dream that she had the night before. It was definitely a dream from God and had great meaning. It was after that, that Paul and I went walking.

Though my husband and I are together all the time, we don’t spend enough QUALITY time together. Just each other and talking. This walk was awesome. It was just me and him talking to each other and worshiping and praising God. Such a GORGEOUS day that God gave us for this. Soft breezes, it wasn’t too hot or too cold. It was just perfect. And for most of it, we didn’t even have other people around. It’s like God wanted us to have this time together.

I remember at one point telling Paul, my husband, that I get frustrated sometimes because I don’t have dreams and visions like other people do. That I feel God is trying to give me all that but I feel like there is a wall there.  Paul’s words were, “It’s not a PHYSICAL wall. It’s mental. You have to push through it.” He then told me that he feels like I think I’m not good enough for it. That is EXACTLY how I’ve always felt.

Fast forward to Sunday, the next day.  I was in a conversation with 2 of my friends at church…one of them being the same one from Saturday that had the dream.  I was talking about the walk and the talk my husband and I had. How I told him that I wanted dreams and visions as well.  My friend told me she was glad I said that because God has put me in her heart. And she felt like I didn’t feel worthy. But that God wants me to have that along with baptism of Holy Spirit.

WOW! Pretty much what I had said. I didn’t feel good enough. Didn’t feel worthy.

Both of my friends decided to pray over me right then. For walls to be torn down. For me to know who I am and WHOSE I am. That I AM WORTHY. I AM GOOD ENOUGH! That the enemies lies would be rejected! It was BEFORE worship had even started.

Whew! I felt God start a work in me and I know it’s more and more each day.  And oh how God worked through worship and regular service.  All of our worship songs were about tearing down lies and walls that day. I felt Him moving in me, all over! What an awesome ENCOUNTER!!

During the prayer and service, I saw this journaling in my mind. So I had to do it when I got home.

To some, I am sure it sounds crazy. But to me…it was and is confirmation. Of all that God has in store for me. Of all that God is doing in me!

Thank you, Heavenly Daddy!

This is one of the songs…and one we have been singing a few weeks at church. One of my new favorites!

Freedom

**** This is from the Bold in the Soul challenge in June. I needed this reminder. And I think it might help someone else, as well, right now.
Food is my struggle. I KNOW that I am healed of that addiction.  I just have to continually walk in that freedom.  It’s not easy, at all. It’s a day by day thing.  And I am learning how to keep giving it all to God! ***
Day4BW-6

FREEDOM: the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved.

This is NOT the photo I had in mind to do when I knew this was my word. I do NOT like doing these photos.  But when God leads me in that direction, I go with it. Especially when He’s telling me it’s for my FREEDOM!

God kept impressing this word on my heart and in my spirit today. My friend even gave me a bracelet with the word FREE…and that was after I had decided the word.


Today, at church, God broke more chains from me. I received FREEDOM from Food Addiction! I received FREEDOM from shame! FREEDOM from myself!
My friend, Amanda, has been special to me ever since I met her. God has always used her to reach me in ways I can’t explain. This morning she posted this on her FB:

“Adam and Eve hid from shame, clothing themselves in fig leaves. They hid from their Father when He came to commune with them. Yet, the Father took the skin of an animal, foreshadowing the shedding of the precious blood of Jesus, and covered them in skins. Jesus redeemed all that was lost in the garden and more. Now we are clothed in Him, skin to skin.”

Then, at church, she spoke on this and how she had let shame cover her, as well. God spoke to me tremendously through this. God revealed things to me, even deeper than before.

I know that food addiction is MORE than the food. It’s really NOT about the food. It’s about what’s in my heart. And today, He laid it out for me. To me. In me. I knew it before. But today, He made me SEE it and FEEL it and KNOW it!

Just yesterday and this morning before church, I was messaging with friends about this very thing. How I have been struggling lately, more than usual, with it. God brought all this to mind as Amanda was speaking at church today. God definitely used her to reach me, once again, today.

Why have I been addicted to food? I use it as a cover. To cover pain from my past. To hide because I’ve been told so many times that I’m not good enough. Why? Because I was always been overweight and didn’t have a big house or name brand clothes as a child. I used it as a cover because I was ashamed of who I was and what I looked like.

I have always been one that when I lose weight, I stop after a while and then start gaining. Why? Because it’s easy to hide behind the weight. As the weight comes off, so does layers of heartache and pain. So does layers of shame that I have heaped upon myself. As the weight comes off, people start seeing me more. Looking at me more. Wanting to know more.

When this happens, it’s scary. Because it’s then that God is able to dig deeper into my soul and uncover things that I would rather leave covered. I let God in but only so far. Today He showed me that I do that. Healing isn’t always easy and simple. Most of the time, real healing HURTS. Real FREEDOM hurts! It’s time that I let Him in all the way. It’s time that I get raw and totally open to Him.

My friend, Kasey, told me, “Living in freedom can sometimes be harder than obeying strict rules”

Wow, what a word! It’s so true. Obeying rules is easy, there really is not a lot of thinking involved once you get the rules down. You can just do what needs to be done and go on.

That is NOT how God wants us to live. He wants us to live in TRUE FREEDOM!! He wants to reach into us and bring out all the junk we want to hide. He wants to bring it out so we can let go of it! So we can move forward! He wants to rip off the layers of shame and cover us with FREEDOM!

Today, God truly showed me that I am NOT food addiction. I am NOT shame. I am NOT timid. I am NOT unworthy.

Today, God showed me that I am FREE! I am a SHAME SLAYER! I am BRAVE! I am FEARLESS! I am WORTHY! I am ENOUGH! I am HIS!

As Amanda said, “Jesus redeemed all that was lost in the garden and more. Now we are clothed in Him, skin to skin.”

God heard that prayer said for me. And has already started answering! lol

This verse that Sarah gave me really hit, as well…

Galatians 5:1
For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.

I’m no longer a slave!  ⚔️  ⚔️  ⚔️ 
FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM!

#GodsGirl #BeautifullyBroken #Freedom#BoldInTheSoul #RevelationWellness#NoLongerASlave #FreedomInChrist #Beautiful#Worthy #GoodEnough #Fearless #ShameSlayer#FitnessTeacherGospelPreacher #MightyVoice#Brave #RevWellVoice #RevWellApparel

 — feeling Free.

** I am currently doing a writing challenge with some other great ladies. Below are the links to their blog posts, as well. Please take a moment and visit them!

http://www.iamsarahmichal.com/2017/09/05/not-open-not-closed/

https://livspiruetter.wordpress.com/2017/09/12/writing-challenge-1-god-redeems-so-dont-give-up-on-relationships/

https://beautifullybroken61.wordpress.com/2017/09/11/freedom/

http://www.spuronlove.com/things-i-need-my-kids-to-know-before-i-die-call-people-up/

Day 1: Bold in the Soul Challenge

Day 1: #BoldInTheSoul Challenge

This is one of my favorite challenges with Revelation Wellness – Healthy & Whole. Probably because I am a word person and I am a photographer. We get to use our warpaint (sharpie) for words to show and tell about our boldness in Christ and what God is telling us about ourselves. A physical trait or a soul trait. Just what makes us Bold In The Soul~

For me, for a while now…God has been using the word Brave. He has definitely shown me that I do NOT fear things like I used to. He has brought me WAY out of my comfort zone. Especially through my instructor training! He used that week to REALLY break me free from chains that held me bound in fear.

I still have a ways to go with different areas…but even today, I am stepping out of myself and letting HIM use me for HIS glory! I am taking what He has given me and trying to help others. Today, I am starting a walking group with my church family. And soon, I will also be reaching out to others outside of my church! I am so excited, but yes, a little nervous. Even though it’s my family and friends.

Are all my fears gone? No. I’m real and honest. I am still working on them. But I do NOT let them overtake me anymore!! I move forward in boldness rather than slinking back in shame!

So today…my word is BRAVE. God wants me to be strong and courageous; brave! So that is what I am always trying to do!

The song, below, has also been in my spirit for a while. God has great plans for me. And especially this verse and chorus are exactly what God has been doing in me!

Brave: ready to face and endure danger or pain; showing courage.

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

“You Make Me Brave” by Amanda Cook

I have heard You calling my name
I have heard the song of love that You sing
So I will let you draw me out beyond the shore
Into Your grace

You make me brave, You make me brave
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves
You make me brave, You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the Love that made a way

#GodsGirl #BeautifullyBroken #BRAVE#BoldInTheSoul #RevelationWellness#RevWellVoice #Joshua19 #YouMakeMeBrave#NoFear #RevWellApparel